Things kids do: 9yo Beautician

So, as it turns out I've been in the midst of a few misadventures. At the moment I'm taking the 'new day every day' approach just to keep sane. Hopefully there will be less of it for at least a while but who knows. Until then let me share with you the latest mishap.

It rained unexpectedly and beautifully last night. I knew it would as my 2yo had thrown my lighters off the balcony and after 5 minutes of stumbling in the dark and shaking trees in case they were stuck up there I gave up and decided to look for them in the morning. You can imagine after such a cool night and how consistent the slick of rain was still sitting on the road that I might not have thought much about my 9yo daughter hopping in the car with her hooded jumper on. She's not only sluggish but quiet most mornings. I was grateful she was in the car and brought her lunch and didn't think much of it or the fact she was so hard to get of bed and had kept her back to me. These things happen.

Anyways I drove em off to their various locations. I have about 1000 kids and none of them go to the same school or daycare so I was focused on the clock and on the look out in traffic, watching for the next bugger who might want to drive in to me. I'm also not thinking much about my 11yo trying to convince the 9yo that a ghost came and shaved her face in her sleep. Maybe you would think it's weird but they constantly stir each other up for jollies and say all kinds of weird stuff most days for no reason that makes much sense to me so it sort of becomes a bit of a background noise unless someone talks to me. At the public school I drop my 9yo off. I looked over her way and her head was down. 'I love you. Have a great day' I said. She gets out of the car and walks off, saying nothing. That was the last I remember of my time with her this morning.

I get this phonecall at about midday and it her school. I hold my breath. She was really stressed out earlier last year and I had to put some extra time in. The school tells me she's been in class with her hoodie on, refusing to take it off and freaking out. I'm told she is also bawling her eyes out. They said they can't get any info out of her and have asked her things like 'have you been in trouble?' and 'has some one hurt you?'. The school says no one here has been anywhere near her. Good thing she was asking for me and begging to go home. Little did I realise it probably looked like I had beat the snot out of her and she was hiding it. I only worked this out about an hour ago. So yeh... I tell the school I will head on over and they are happy with that. I hear them asking her if she is sure she wants to go home. I don't really wanna go get her but I didn't know what it was about, if it was a schoolwork compliance thing, bullying thing or something else. I wscanned my brain and searched all my memories. I haven't even got pissed off at her lately and she hasn't missed out on anything.... it couldn't be me.... could it?

I show up at the school. I'm reading work emails very seriously but also reading text messages and I'm laughing my arse off (silently though. This is a serious situation). They show up and I put my serious face on. I don't know if mummy is in trouble or not. I ask her if she wants to talk about it and she shakes her head but nods when I offer to talk about it in the car. We drive off. She sits in the back. I'm being lighthearted about things. I asked if she ate her lunch and she says yes but she didn't spend the spare change I gave her. I tell her I was going to buy a stunner meal but that I didn't because I had to go pick her up. She sobs so I say I'm still hungry and ask if she wants one too. She says 'no' but asks for a Krusher so I suggest I have a go at eating the whole 24 nuggets I can buy for $10 at KFC instead and she laughs at me.

We arrive at KFC, get drive-thru and she starts crying. I assume she still misses nan-nan. Her great grandma passed away in 2014 and she still sobs about it sometimes. I asked her if she was missing someone and she says 'yes' I ask who and she tells me it's nan-nan. I of course think I'm brilliant at the time because I've already been down this road with her before and I've 'worked it out'. This changed of course when I passed her the Krusher. She takes the drink and stares at me and we are frozen in that moment for what felt like hours, but was probably only maybe 4 seconds. 'What happened to you?' I finally ask. She just shrugs. 'Is this what is making you cry?' She nods. I recall the ghost story my 11yo had told her this morning and I suddenly regret all that ghost hunting I've been keen on and I worry that I brought home a spirit that will eventually shave off all the eyebrows in our house while we are sleeping and draw them back on 1cm thick. 'Did you do this?' She nods and I suddenly let go of that breath I didn't know I was holding. I tell her I have a plan.

We go home and we eat. I sit on my balcony, staring at the trees thinking about it. We are going to the shopping centre. Someone else has to fix this. What the hell does everyone else do when their children shave off their own eyebrows? We get there and jackpot at the second salon we stop at. A lady takes her in and helps get the comic brows off her face and uses an eyebrow pencil and puts something else there. She's talking to her about how everybody makes a mistake sometimes, especially with make up and even shared a few stories she knew. I'm pleased as punch but also concerned about the bit where she said it'll take a few months and she will have to use a pencil to do her own eyebrows for several months till it grows back. Mummy will, dear. They all tell her how wonderful and better she looks. She can see herself in the mirror and yeh it looks heaps better. I thank her so much and pay the $30 for the pencil. Are you ladies crazy? Do you all really pay this much for makeup!?!?!?!?

We go on for the rest of the day doing various things I needed to get done and rather had not been doing. She tells me she thinks she has seen an old lady at McDonalds before who must have done the same thing and says her eyebrows looked the same. The rest is history..... Me on the computer still in shock and wonder. I hope you enjoyed the story. It's true.

If you ever see us down the street acknowledge I didn't give her a makeover. It wasn't me. When you look at her just smile and don't be shocked. She's probably got a few months of this to get through and then over.

Have a laugh for me. I didn't dare.

Have a great weekend.

-Mez